Twenty nine weeks;

So I realised just now that I don't post pictures of my bump with Tyler at all, really. The obvious reasons being I am busy with my own home and my daughter who is already here. I want this to change. I want to document this pregnancy just like I did with Lilia's, but I know I have left it a little late to do so. I wish I had posted from the beginning, I wish I had said all my thoughts and feelings at each weekly update.. But I didn't. It takes like ten minutes to do a pregnancy update so I should be able to do one every week from now on when Lilia naps. That's if I remember, ha ha. So I am feeling good in this pregnancy, much better than I did with Lilia. I am getting hot and bothered all the time, as every heavily pregnant woman usually does. I am constantly thirsty, and nothing seems to get rid of it for long. I guess it's because of my high temperature and just generally needing more fluids for Tyler, but it is kind of annoying. At my last antenatal I was measuring twenty five weeks (it was a twenty five week appointment, but I was twenty six weeks), so a week behind. But nothing to worry about. Honestly though, I don't feel like I am measuring a week behind! I feel like I am measuring bigger, if anything! I can't really compare how I felt size-wise with Tyler to Lilia because it seems like so long ago, but I was measuring on time with her. I can't really think of much else to be honest, I have antenatal tomorrow so I will let you all know how that goes but it'll probably just be a short update.

Twelve month jabs :(

My poor little angel had her twelve month jabs today. Not one, not two, but THREE needles. It was awful. I refused to hold her for her first ever jabs as I was too scared and didn't know what to expect. I held her for her next two lots, and I coped. For her one year old jabs however, I couldn't cope. I was too nervous about going alone because of her age and how aware she is now. Not only that but I knew I would cry - I am SUCH a pregnant, hormonal, idiot, and knowing my baby was going to get hurt and not being able to prevent the pain was too much for me to handle. James was in work and couldn't really take any time off, so I asked my friend to come with me. She was the one who came to Lilia's first ever jabs, and she was amazing. She agreed to support me.
As soon as we got to the surgery I was getting nervous and emotional. Lilia fell asleep right before we got to the surgery, so I woke her up as soon as we were in. I figured it would be nicer to wake her up once we got there and were waiting rather than waking her up to take her in and be poked and prodded. So I woke her up and surprisingly she didn't mind. She liked being in a new place and loved nosing at all the other babies that were there (Thursday's are baby surgery day, when everyone has their jabs or check ups). She was doing good, I stripped her down to her nappy to be weighed and waited to be called. My health visitor called us in to weigh her, and she now weighs 23lbs exactly. We got sent back into the waiting room while the nurse prepared the vaccinations.
We got called in five minutes later and in the two second walk to the door I could feel my heart pounding in my chest, I was so nervous for my little girl. I hate her being hurt. The nurse assumed my friend was her mother as she was holding her, I was a little embarrassed when I said that I am her mother, I'm just too scared to hold her.. But she just laughed and said it was quite common for lots of babies, especially ones at this age. I heard her telling my friend that she had to hold her extremely tight because at that age they wriggle and squirm and do everything in their power to get away from the nasty lady putting them in pain. It was at that point that I turned around. I never look with her jabs anyway, but I literally walked to the other end of the room and tried to read all the posters that were put up to take my mind off it.. Then all I heard was "okay are you ready?" and Lilia SCREAMED. I have never heard her scream like that before, ever. She has had bumps and bruises and bleeds before, she has been hurt and knows pain, but never have I heard her scream like that. Ever. She whimpered, and then screamed again. I could tell in her cry when each needle was entering her leg. My poor, poor baby. I started to tear up, but tried to concentrate on the posters so I wouldn't look like a complete fool. I wanted to leave the room so bad, and had asked the nurse so many times in my head. I wanted to leave, but decided that would be selfish of me. I should be there to cuddle her when it's done. So I stayed, and heard her scream one more time after my friend had switched her over to the other leg. As soon as I knew they were done I turned around. The nurse put a plaster over her leg and I grabbed her straight away. My friend was flustered and shaking, I was shaking, Lilia was shaking.. It was just one big mess.
We went back out in to the waiting room and had to wait there for ten minutes. During those ten minutes I gave Lilia some milk and some chocolate buttons, along with plenty of kisses and cuddles. She was fine within two minutes of being out of the nurses room. It was obviously just the shock and the hurt that made her cry, they weren't hurting her anymore. We waited the ten minutes and then made our way back to my house. We sat outside on a bench for a little while and Lilia sat in her pram babbling away and playing with her toes. My Princess was totally fine, thank God.
She has been fine for the rest of the day, but being a mother I still worry. It is 12:22am right now, I have to be up early in the morning for a visitor to the house, but I just can't sleep.. I want to make sure I'm awake just in case anything happens. Not that it will.. But just in case. My poor little baby, I am so dreading going through it again with Tyler. The one year jabs have to be the worst. I am hoping her next lot (aged three, I think) are better. But if she's anything like me I know they won't be.
Lilia had her turn today, and I have mine on Saturday. I have my twenty eight weeks bloods (a week late) in the morning and I am so dreading them. I hate needles and hate blood... Will I faint? Probably. But Lilia was a very brave girl, so I have to be too.

My cheeky little monkey.

Last night Lilia was having her last five minute play before bed. She crawled off and I thought nothing of it, but it was suddenly quiet.. Now all of my mummy friends should know that quiet is not good when there's a baby involved.. So I went to see what she was doing, and I found her with mud all around her face and on her fingers. It was on her clothes too, it was just everywhere! I didn't know where she got it from until she grinned this big cheesy grin at me. She only does that certain smile when she's done something she shouldn't have.. I opened her mouth and there was a big clump of mud sitting on her tongue! So gross. I spent a good five to ten minutes picking mud and bits of grass out of her teeth, from under tongue, the roof of her mouth, etc.. This was literally like ten minutes after I'd bathed her and brushed her teeth, the little monkey! I wet wiped her over and brushed her teeth again, twice!
I can't get over her and her big cheesy grin when she realised I noticed she was up to no good! My beautiful girl is definitely one in a million, and definitely worth all the cheekiness and naughtiness :) I do love her!

Guess who has a one year old?!

I've been meaning to post an updated photo of my little Princess for a while now, but I still haven't found my bloody camera lead! So I just picked one out from the one's I had on my mobile and tried to make it look a little better than what it was. The quality on my phone camera is so crappy compared to my digital camera, but I just had to post a photo of my beautiful ONE YEAR OLD! I can't believe she is one. It feels like yesterday I found out I was pregnant with her, let alone gave birth. She is just so precious, I am so lucky to have her. This post is two days late from her actual birthday, but I've been busy spoiling her, ha ha.

Dear baby girl,

I guess I can't really call you baby any more, huh. It has been a whole year since the first time I saw your beautiful face. A whole year since the first time we met. That year has gone by in a flash. You were so little and helpless, you couldn't even hold your head up. Now it seems that within a matter of days you have learnt how to be independent, crawling and pulling yourself up on things, talking, playing on your own, etc. You are truly wonderful, and it is so magical watching you grow. You have completely changed in the blink of an eye. You have gone from a tiny little baby to a big toddling girl. It's mad to think that a year ago you could barely even open your eyes for long, and now you're holding my hands to walk places. My love for you has been growing for over a year now, and it will keep on growing forever. I can't get my head around the fact that you have been in my life for a year. It can seem like no time at all, and forever at the same time. I don't know where I would be if I hadn't had you. I certainly wouldn't be who I am today. I have you to thank for everything I've become. You are perfection. A whole year of it. And I am looking forward to spending the rest of my life watching you in awe as you grow older. On your birthday, at 8:45am, I sat in bed crying. Crying because I couldn't believe how big you are now, that it had been a year to the minute since you entered the world. And on your second, third, fourth, etc, birthdays.. I will be doing the same. I am the proudest mummy in the world.

I love you big girl,

mummy.

Hints/tips to people who pretend to be mothers..

So lately I've had a load of random people viewing my Stardoll page. Most of these people just happen to be mothers. You can clearly tell that most, if not all, of them are lying. A few little give-aways to those who claim they are parents and from the UK (because obviously I can't speak for those abroad as I don't know the rules there);
- We don't have glucose tests. We have three blood tests - one at twelve weeks, one at eighteen weeks (usually) and one at twenty eight weeks. The ones at twelve and twenty eight weeks are routine, but the eighteen week tests are to see how likely it is that your baby has Downs Syndrome, you can refuse that blood test if you wish (I did). So when people tell me about their glucose test, or ask what flavour drink I chose, I know they're lying. We are not even told about them in the UK, so obviously the person lying is copying what most people who are known for being pregnant young are saying, and they're usually from Canda, America, etc.
- We only have two medical ultrasounds. People in America, etc, tend to have more than that and again fakes from the UK copy this. We have one at twelve weeks and one at twenty weeks. The only cases in which that may change is if something is wrong and you need monitoring or whatever, or you're having multiples. Like I had an extra scan early on with Peanut due to pains. Scan pictures cost £3 each, except for with your dating scan you get ONE picture for free. 4D scans are available in certain hospitals here, but they are veeery expensive.
- We don't have a doctor/OB, whatever you want to call them. We are only assigned midwives, and even then we might not even get the one we were given. It is only midwives that you will see throughout your pregnancy, apart from sonographers at the scans. You will have a certain team of midwives, but when you get to hospital in labour if your team isn't on duty until a certain time, then you will have one from the hospital who you probably haven't even met before.
- At ultrasounds, they don't play you the baby's heartbeat. They show the heart beating to you, but you don't hear it. You don't hear it until you go to antenatal clinic at twenty five weeks, or around that. And then it is by a doppler not ultrasound.
- At antenatal appointments, they don't measure around your bump. They measure from the top of your bump to the bottom, and if you are 25wks, then the cms you are should be around 25 too. You also don't get checked up your woohoo. The only time you do get checked up your woohoo is if you are in labour (or think you are), and not before.


People are so dumb for saying they live in the UK and copying what American's or whatever say happens during pregnancy:').

My new blog :)

I've made another blog under this account, it's not a personal blog and won't contain anything to do with my daughter but it's a little passion I have on the sly..
I'm writing a story and I'm putting the chapters into the blog so I can edit them or whatever whenever I want to. This idea was inspired by my friend, who did the same thing but on Facebook.. I'm not confident enough to make my writing that public just yet, ha ha.
So if you're wondering what on earth is going on.. This explains it :). I've only created the blog today, and it has had five views already.. In the space of what, an hour? So check it out if you want, feedback is welcome too :)

On another note - I still haven't found my camera cable, that's why I'm putting off blogging on this blog. But I have taken I think two bump photos on my phone so I'll just upload them to my updates on my pregnancy in the meantime :).

Time has flown!

In fifteen days my baby girl will be ONE! I can't believe it! I can't believe how big she is now compared to what she was when I first met her. I can't believe how far she's come.. I can't believe she's mine.
I am in awe at her and I can't wait to celebrate her first birthday with her, though I bet I will cry. I am tearing up just writing this post, watching her playing on the floor with her toys and thinking 'my gosh, you've been mine for almost a year' (longer including pregnancy).
We're having a little tea party for her on the 16th, because it is a Saturday. On the actual day I don't know what I am doing with her yet, but I want to do something special with her. James will be in work so he'll miss most of her birthday, but he said it's okay he'll make up for it in the evening if she's still awake.
I've been meaning to update you all with a photo of her, but I've lost the lead to my camera in amongst the mess of moving, and it still hasn't been sorted, ha ha. I will update with one soon though, promise!

I am keeping this post short and sweet because 1) I don't want to cry, ha ha. And 2) I will be writing a longer, letter-like post, to Lilia on her actual birthday. I can't believe that this time last year I was ready to pop at any time!