Saturday, 29 September 2012

Why am I such a f#ck up?!

My life is such a mess. He can't stand to be around me and I can't stand myself either. Funny how things change in the space of an hour. I've ruined everything, and there's no going back now. Nothing I can say or do will change anything this time. I've made my bed, now I must lie in it. I need to quit feeling sorry for myself and move on. Concentrate on my babies, not the hurt in my heart. I wish the pain was as easy to wipe away as the tears are. What is love? And why does it hurt so freaking bad?! Why can't love be accepted as imperfect and forgiven when the imperfections take over? Why can't people concentrate on the good times and not the bad? Why did I have to be so stupid and ruin everything, just as they were starting to look up? I really do hate the way I am sometimes. I never think. Ever.
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2 comments:

  1. Holly29 September 2012 at 14:59

    You have just had a baby! Be kind to yourself, your life is not a f**k up a man is not the be all and end all, I promise you that. You need to love yourself because there is a lot there to be loved. I hope you are not going through this alone, have you a friend who can stay with you?
    If you need to talk I am here I know you only know me from here but we have been friends for nearly 2 years online & I hate to think of you going through this alone. Reply to this comment to let me know if you are okay?
    You can have my email address if you would like to talk privately HUGE massive hug
    YOU are a good person, please don't be so hard on yourself Xx

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    Replies
    1. Bellaaah.x30 September 2012 at 15:35

      I'm okay, just had a bad day. Actions have consequences and sometimes they're a bit drastic but that's life!
      Why do people only concentrate on the bad times and forget about the good?! Siigh:(!
      I shall live though, I've been in an amazing mood today:D

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