I am not feeling too good lately. Since yesterday I think. I was already constantly feeling tired but now I am feeling run down and just plain awful. I have a constant headache, I am always feeling dehydrated, I am feeling sick - sometimes so sick that I heave even when I cough, I have terrible bowel movements.. I was so worried it might be a sign that I am going into labour soon because I am constantly on the toilet. I just feel terrible and really want to be left alone to sleep all day. Of course that is impossible with Lilia around and no help during the day.
I am just getting so stressed over how much we have left to do before Tyler arrives and having to do everything while feeling like this is not fun at all. Poor Lilia is only doing little things wrong, like sitting in the way of me sweeping, and I am acting as if it's the end of the world! Usually I'd just ask her to move and if she doesn't I'd move her myself, but I am so stressed out and feeling so crappy that I find myself screaming at her. I feel so bad because I never shout at her, but I am just feeling so terrible I want to get all jobs over and done with so I can sit on the sofa. Even then she is crawling all over me and pushing on my stomach.
As soon as I shout at her I feel so bad, I can see her tear up and when she cries it breaks my heart knowing that she is crying because of me :( I cuddle her every time afterwards, the guilt just eats me up :(
But it is soo hard to be able to be everywhere and do everything while feeling so drained. I don't want to have a premature baby or anything, but I honestly cannot wait until I am not pregnant anymore. As soon as I have Tyler and my body is my own I am determined it is going to stay my own for a VERY long time!
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